Playoff Happy Hour

Welcome to PnR's Playoff Happy Hour- 60 random thoughts on the NBA Playoffs. We might as well get right into the list.

1. Tonight, the Girl behind Mark D'Antoni in the front row wearing a Ginobili jersey was amazing. I want to marry you baby. If you read this give me a call.

2. CP3 is the best point guard on the planet!!!

3. On a similar note, ESPN the Magazine had an article a few issues ago that said Paul invited his friends from other teams to stay at his place while they were on the road. I imagine that if Jason Kidd ever gets this invitation that he will show up with a machete. Paul beat Kidd like Kidd used to beat his own wife.

4. Another note on the Suns-Spurs game tonight... It was great to see Tony Parker flop like he had been shot by Raja Bell at the 8 minute mark of the fourth quarter in a two point game. Really one of my favorite all time flops.

5. D'Antoni should be fired.

6. After 10 drinks I often refer to him as Mark D'Antoni.

7. After 15 drinks he gets called either Mike or Mark D'Antonio.

8. After 20 drinks he gets called, "fag coach hiding the hot girl".

9. Avery Johnson should be on his way out as well. Nothing against either of these guys, but they have missed their shots at titles, and the organizations need to make a move to try to improve, even if it means taking a step back.

10. Steve Nash is great on a decent team, but teams that want to win a title can't win it with Steve. There is not one player in the league that he can guard. His defense is such a joke.

11. The Lakers are pretty good.

12. I love Kobe and LeBron, but if you had to choose a player to take you to a title for one year, wouldn't Duncan have to come into the conversation as well? Who would be the best guy for a one year all or nothing scenario?

13. America, congrats on finally getting to meet Josh Smith.

14. Hack-A-Shaq is stupid.

15. Hack-A-Shaq is gay.

16. Congrats to everyone who has advanced so far..... well, except for the Spurs... I fell asleep 10 times during the game tonight.

17. That being said, Manu is my boy.

18. If I see one more commercial for "The Delfest Concert", I am going to kill someone. Is a bluegrass band really getting to its target audience during NBA games?

19. The other night the TNT cast asked Chris Webber what the Pistons needed to do to stay focused at home. To paraphrase Webber, "This series is 2-2, it ain't a chill with the boys at the crib kinda night.... you have to focus on the game". I think that statement alone clears up any questions as to why Webber never became one of the best basketball players ever.

20. Isn't it funny that Chris Paul and Chris Quinn play the same position in the same basketball league? How big of a drop in talent level is that?

21. Isn't it funny that Chris Paul and Jason Kidd play the same position in the same basketball league? How big of a drop in talent level is that?

22. Al Horford, I'm sorry. Please don't come kick my ass. You now rule my friend.

23. It was cool that people in Atlanta just found out that the city still had a basketball franchise.

24. When Deron Williams doesn't have it going the Jazz only score 69 points. Tonight was a good example of this.

25. Skip To My Lou

26. When Joe Johnson drove the lane in Game 4, the Celtics' defense spread as wide as Kim Kardashian's legs in the video with Ray J.

27. Speaking of Game 4 of that series, I had to miss "The Hills" because of it... WTF NBA? Can't you schedule around these kinda things?

28. Number 27 is a completely serious and legit complaint.

29. Samuel Dalembert went for 22 and 16 in a playoff game.

30. Number 29 is a completely serious and legit statement.

31. Getting 60 thoughts is going to be a challenge.

32. These next few are going to deal with the upcoming New Orleans-San Antonio series.

33. New Orleans can actually beat San Antonio. Paul will do a decent job on Parker and will be Chris Paul on the offensive end. They have a legit second star in David West and some guys who are athletic enough to slow down Manu.

34. The biggest concern? David West is always 2 seconds away from doing something dumb and getting tossed.

35. Can Jannero Pargo stay this hot? The kid was up in flames in round 1.

36. What kind of parent names one kid Jannero (a WTF kinda name) and another Jeremy (an American name)?

37. I do wonder if New Orleans has enough depth to stay with San Antonio. On the other hand, is San Antonio too old to keep up with New Orleans? I hope those old heads are too old. On behalf of every NBA fan, we hate you Spurs!!

38. By the way, anyone who uses Hack-A-Shaq should be ashamed.

39. How is Hack-A-Shaq not an intentional foul?

40. I imagine that you have stopped reading this by now (that means you Stanecsworth).

41. If not, what the Wizards are doing to LeBron is just as bad if not worse than Hack-A-Shaq. They are killing the King.

42. It looks like Detroit will get passed Philly, but it seems clear that their run is over unless Tayshaun Prince makes the unlikely transformation from the homeless man's Scottie Pippen into the welfare recipient's Scottie Pippen. Clearly, the welfare recipient's Scottie Pippen is a much better and much more selfish player.

43. Or the Pistons could try to move someone in an effort to get an explosive 2/3 who can score in order to take the pressure off of Billups and Hamilton. The key would be keeping Maxiell, so that means maybe guys like Rodney Stuckey and Antonio McDyess would have to be shopped in order to get a great talent.

44. Dwight Howard is a force of nature.

45. Chris Bosh is a girl. A really good girl, but still a 6'10 122 pound girl.

46. As always, the TNT studio crew has been great.

47. Hack-A-Shaq is really dumb.

48. However, those saying that the Hack-A-Shaq played a big role in the series (like me) are really completely wrong. It was five possesions a game, and if Phoenix wanted to they could Hack-A-Duncan, who happens to be almost as bas at the line.

49. Shocker, Grant Hill got hurt. I mean really, I'm stunned that Grant would go down with an injury.

50. Hedo got the Most Improved Player Award. We are happy anytime one of our boys gets some love.

51. Brendan Haywood went and talked that shit on LeBron. I have a strange feeling that at some point in Game 5, King James will come flying down the lane and shove his balls into Haywood's mouth.

52. I feel that people are taking LBJ for granted because he is just so good. He is so consistent that 30-8-8 doesn't even impress people anymore.

53. Number 52 also happened to Tim Duncan for awhile.

54. The Spurs may win it all this year, but I feel like this is their last year as a dominant team.

55. Who would have guessed that Atlanta and Boston would be tied 2-2?

56. Who would have guessed that Philly would have broken 50 once this series?

57. I'll admit it, I had to look up how to spell Kim Kardashian earlier.

58. The Floss woulda spelled it right on the first try, because he types it into google images so often for beat-off material.

59. Funny that the Wizards are going to lose to the Cavs three years in a row.

60. LeBron for MVP and Lauren Conrad and Stephen Coletti 4-ever.

Happy Hour is over..... Sorry it was worse than the Suns.

-NM